I once worked at a fine dining restaurant at Dempsey Hill as a waitress.
One quiet afternoon, my manager motioned for me to come near the kitchen. It was during the lull period. He started sharing about his life experiences in bed and on clubbing. He then asked me if I was a virgin. I felt very uncomfortable and noticed two other waiters nearby. I gestured for them to come over in hopes that the conversation would end. Another reason was due to wanting evidence of his sexual harassment.
He continued his speech on how women should perform sexual acts and I was horrified. Being one of the two female waitresses, I was worried for my safety. I happened to meet the other female waitress during a shift days later and asked if the manager said anything inappropriate. She nodded and I asked her why she did not tell anyone. She confided in me that she wanted to but was fearful of losing her job.
In this context, the stakeholders are the restaurant owners, management and employees. The ethical principles the manager lacked include respect for employees, leadership and integrity. To take action, I would need to lodge a complaint to the upper management. If I do so, it would cause problems when working under that manager in future. Furthermore, I would get the other female employee involved against her wishes. However, if I do not, other female employees under him would get sexually harassed.
After much deliberation, I decided to leave the job. I informed the other female manager that I quit due to sexual harassment. I also stated that the other female waitress underwent the same experience as me. This was a call for action to deal with the manager’s inappropriate behavior.
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I think you did the right thing, Audrey. Sexual harassment should be reported one way or another. I like the sensitivity you’ve shown for your female colleague.
Note: Use “would” for possible consequences; “will” for strong desire (determination) and natural Science, e.g. “The sun will rise tomorrow”.
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Thank you so much for the feedback, I have edited the post accordingly.
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I think leaving the job is the right decision given the circumstances and your difficult position. After all, the person you were experiencing sexual harassment from is your boss. In addition, you did great by informing the other female manager before you left, both to inform her of the reason you were leaving and thus ensuring that the sexual harassment did not happen to other female employees.
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I thought that quitting the job was the correct decision to make since you were uncomfortable and horrified by the incident. It was a good decision not to confront your manager and informed your other manager of the sexual harassment that took place in the workplace. However, in my opinion, I do not think that it was right for you to inform the manager that “the other female waitress underwent the same experience” as I assumed you would have told the female manager the name of the other female waitress. This might cause trouble for the other female waitress that is still working in that fine dining restaurant. She might not have wanted to get involved or let anyone know that the male manager had harassed her verbally.
From:
Lim Qian Qi Ariel
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